(Why am I not in bed?)

Grab the nearest book.
* Open the book to page 56.
* Find the fifth sentence.
* Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
* Don't dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST.

"Vietnamese monastics start their day a bit earlier, beginning the morning chant around 4:00 or 5:00."

And so here, I must profess a most hearty THANK YOU to my dear friend (and personal psychic consultant ;-) peskyaura for giving me the best piece of advice/idea evar.  Since school ended, every day that we've been home, we've spent two hours after lunch at "quiet play".  Quiet play is the practice of everyone going somewhere by themselves to either nap or play (or in my case, cook, garden & do co-op work) without interacting with anyone else.

This is brilliant.

This is keeping me sane.

At the end of the day, I don't feel like throwing my children bodily through a window (usually).

I love this.

It took a bit of coercion at first, but now the boys are fine with it.  Alex kinda likes playing by himself for a bit, and Ian is back to taking naps which he both needs and from which we all benefit.  And I can get some work done unmolested.  Good stuff all around.

Oh, and as a side note, today my kids had to be restrained from eating their way straight through our garden.  This is a problem I do not mind having.  =)

Read along with me, won't you?

"The way the TARP is designed -- and I didn't design this -- but the way it's designed is every dollar that comes back goes into the general fund but that does still create additional head room under the $700 billion authority for us to make capital investments," Geithner said. "So we have the ability to still use the $700 billion if we think there's a strong case for doing that, but the way the program works is a dollar comes in and goes to the general fund but still creates additional room for us to make a new..." "So your understanding of what we did is that the Treasury now has $700 billion that it can use permanently," DeMint said, "rotating in and out of the capital markets as you see fit?" "Well, I'm not quite sure permanent, but you're right," Geithner said.

Some of the folks who read this blog might recall me mentioning, oh, way back a few months ago, an interesting choice of wording in the original bailout deal.  To wit, Congress did not authorize the Sec. of the Treasury to use $700b; rather, it authorized to have in use up to $700b at any time.  In fact, I used this as an example repeatedly in my Critical Thinking class to demonstrate loaded language.  Welllll.... the chickens have come home to roost, have they not?  All that money that the banksters (headed by Paulson, now Geithner) were supposed to pay back to us taxpayers?  Ah well.  Turns out the banks now get their very own revolving fund, and the taxpayers get--what else?--the debt.

You didn't really want public schools and ambulances, did you?

And he did it ALL himself (except for cutting out the rat and the foam core).

T'is adorable.

A good day, even if a little bit on the "ow. ow. ow. ow." side due to excessive gardening.  I've finally recovered most of our back patio area from The Branches That Stole The World (off of the tree we had cut down).  All tree refuse is now stowed in small bundles on the sides of our property, awaiting transport elsewhere.  I have concrete again.  This is, actually, a good thing.  I can put our picnic table and more container plants out now.  Our kids can play without fear of being impaled.  Yeah.

I had an awesome tarot reading last night, too, done by a good friend of mine from college (waves at peskyaura ).  She's damned good--I highly recommend her -- www.melissatarot.com.  She had that dead-on accuracy thing goin' on, and the reading's final result pretty much was the best card you can get, so that's an upbeat kinda thing, ya know.  I've been inspired to dig my tarot stuff back out, too.  And, as luck would have it, I have the hallowed "Hello Tarot" deck, which I bought on a whim about 10 years ago.  The deck is now (still, I think) in litigation between the artist and Sanrio, and is out of print.  Apparently, when you can find one, it goes for around $500.  Huh!  It's a damned cute deck, too.  The cardstock quality is poor, though, so I don't use it very often--probably even less often now that I understand how much the bloody thing is worth.  (Mine is still in mint or near-mint.)

Well, today is Ian's last day at preschool, and I'm feeling pretty bittersweet about it.  He's not old enough to go to kindergarten next year, so in all likelihood he'll be back home with me or dad next year, however that will work (we'll see how the job situation pans out).  I'm sad that he won't get to continue preschool.  He enjoys it so much there, he has friends, and they have so much awesome stuff to do that I couldn't have here even if I did have the money for it all.  I know he can easily occupy himself here, and we've got plenty of toys & stuff, but...  Ah well.  Of course, I also enjoy having time without the kids, although I've never really gotten to use it that way as until now I'd be teaching instead.  But today, at least, I'll have a bit of time while both of the kids are at school and I can get some work done at home (well, at least until the meeting I've got scheduled at 10a). 

This whole timeperiod for me is like one long bittersweet memory.  So many parts of my life are coming to a close.  And I don't yet know what's going to open from here, nor do I know if it will be good or bad. 

I feel as though I ought post something, but I've got nothing to say. 

Hm.

Maybe it's time for bed, eh?

I just got home from a super-productive meeting for the co-op.  I think the alcohol helped.  We made several key decisions, and also started to line out a timeline for progress.  We come close.  Closer and closer.

I turned in my grades today, with just over an hour to spare!  That was cutting it closer than I like, but once I saw that I would have some time to spare, I slowed down and took more care.  I would hate to screw a student due to a spreadsheet error.

Not too much else going on.  Both B and I are now technically out of work, although we've got a couple months of pay left (because B chose to have his pay spread over a year, rather than for the 9 month academic calendar).  We just hope we (one of us, at least) will land a good/decent job by the end of summer.  We're still hoping for B to find a job in the public school system.  *fingers crossed*

Today has been exhausting in an unparalleled fashion.  To begin with, both Brian and I are in total grading frenzy mode, which means we've not been sleeping enough, and when we do sleep (or at least, when I sleep) it's pretty poor quality.  The chamomile tea is helping. 

*sigh* 

I gave my last final (probably ever) today.  It was bittersweet.  I already miss teaching a bit.  I doubt I'll ever teach at the college level again; even if I hated every second of it, it would still be a bit disconcerting. 

We had Alex's annual case conference review today, which went... well... tensely?  They're pushing for more interventions, and we're pushing back, but only limitedly.  They are concerned, fairly, about Alex's ability to succeed without more one-on-one attention and time out of the chaotic classroom.  We, on the other hand, are worried about Alex's ability to learn to cope with conditions he doesn't want to be in, and his ability to work on his own.  I don't understand how he will ever learn to be focused and self-directed if he's given excessive one-on-one attention because he can't right now.  Are we giving up on his ever being able to do such things?  I mean, if we wanted to take this to its logical conclusion, we could just pull him out of school entirely, homeschool him in a quiet, non-overwhelming environment replete with near continuous one-on-one attention.  I'm sure he would succeed delightfully at his academics in such a situation--anyone would.  But how is that going to help him cope with non-custom-tailored-to-Alex's-needs situations?  How will that help him become self-directed?  Focused?  Coping with chaotic, loud, overwhelming environments?  I guess we could engineer such things--that seems a bit psycho to me. 

*sigh again* 

I guess I'm just tired, and confused, and exhausted, and tired, and I need to grade and cook and make a schedule for tomorrow's Terre Foods activities, and on and on and on... 

*sigh*

Look at this instead!


Great gods, but the world is messed up.

Yoinked from nacho_cheese!

( I don't really read enough anymore to justify this, but... )

He was older than Yoda, and maybe just as wise.  At the same time he wasn't old at all--not anymore.  He was maybe even younger than my children.  He saw things everyone else missed.  He reveled in the new, and the unnoticed.  He loved my children.  And when he looked at you, when he spoke to you, you knew you were worth it.  You knew he loved you, appreciated you, and believed that you were as beautiful as anything else in the world.  He was happy that you were alive.

We'll miss you, John Laska.

Well, posts on this are already all over my f-list and various email lists, so I figure I'll throw my $.02 into the ring.  This is what I wrote up for my other blog:

 

( cut that shit out. )

Okay, I know I've got a bunch of people on my f-list who garden within city limits (and yes, containers on patios & balconies count).  Well, get over to The Urban Garden Project and be counted!  They're trying to get 100,000 urban gardens started by 2020.  Honestly, I suspect there already are that many, but it's the thought that counts, right?

I spent all day at one of our local nunnery's Earth Day event, grilling up the burgers, brats & pork patties for our co-op, and I am sunburnt.  Yup, first sunburn of the season!  I am exhausted, but it was a lot of fun.  And the co-op made around $500 just from selling salads--we haven't even gotten our take from the grilling stand yet!  Yeah!

We came home, then went out to dinner (did I mention that I was exhausted?), and then Brian headed off to church to babysit for some Vampire LARPers who rent the Religious Education wing once a month--he's a board member, and there has to be at least one board member present at any event not hosted by a member of the congregation.  Not long after he left, we had our next "first of the season"--the ice cream truck!  Some of you may remember how really bizarrely special this is to me, as I grew up out in B.F.E. on a 1/4 mile long private drive and no ice cream truck would ever dream of coming by.  In fact, one year for my birthday my parents hired an ice cream truck to come out to our house and serve ice cream to the party.  So anyway, we go tearing outside to pick our treats (which were the wonderful, cheap little popsicles rather than the $4.00 mega-delux ice cream thingumies).  The kids then proceded to play outside for another couple of hours, planting bean seeds in their garden, pushing each other down the slide and then pulling each other back up, and generally being total boys.  I chatted a bit with my neighbor, planted more beans, read some gardening ideology, and generally enjoyed the evening.  The kids eventually came over to sit with me, and finally caved and asked to go to bed.

Ah.  Good day.  Oh, and while I might look like a total lobster right now, the aloe I've smeared all over me is at least preventing much pain from setting in.  Either that, or I'm so sunburnt that I actually burned off the main layer of nerve endings in my skin.  Hm.  Well, I guess we'll see.

Okay, so here's what that whole "f*cked up 80 ways" thing was all about (I've been cleared to discuss it).  The interim chair of the Philosophy dept (hereafter PD) has been on sabbatical this year.  We got an email from him on Tuesday informing us that he has taken a chair position at a different university about 3 hours away, and is resigning. 

Hm.

So, let's give you a picture of the whole situation here.  When Brian came on board, he was the fourth faculty member of the PD.  You might have already picked up on the fact that this department is almost entirely disfunctional, mostly due to two of the faculty--hint: not Brian or the interim chair.  We just found out yesterday from a friend who was in the Dean's office during Brian's hire that the main reason for opening a position in the PD and hiring Brian was a desperate attempt to change the department dynamics and subvert some of the dysfunction.  But the dysfunction of the department would not be swayed, and has in fact escalated remarkably in the past year with the hiring of our new secretary.  There have been two incidents that involved Brian being deposed by the police as a witness.  Eesh.

So ANYWAY, now the chair has resigned.  This leaves a department of three.  Wait, no, two, cause they didn't rehire Brian.  And those two are entirely dysfunctional and incapable of running the department (this has now been established in both cases, it's not conjecture).  And one of those will be retiring in 1-2 years.  One faculty.

Obviously, this is the end of the PD, and probably of any philosophy program, at this University.  No big surprise, they've already stripped Philosophy out of the core entirely.  So maybe once the majors are all done, they'll just end the program, and maybe even the minor.  BUT, the University's big problem?  The majors.  The University MUST provide a way for them to graduate with their chosen degree as listed in the Catalog under which they enrolled.  To not do so invites lawsuits.  So...

There's a non-trivial chance that they will hire Brian back on a full-time, non-tenure-track basis to finish out the majors.  The (ex) department chair recommended this to the temporary chair and to the Dean.  This would be GOOD.

Now--my favorite part--Brian was discussing some of this with various majors after class yesterday, and was demuring a bit on whether or not the Dean would rehire him.  One of the majors said "What if I write a letter to the Dean about it?"  Brian said that he thought that would be fine, but he doubted that one letter from one student would have much impact on the Dean.  Then one of the officers of the Student Government said, "Well, it depends on how many students write to him...."  *snort*  When B told me this, I was in the middle of putting a fork of food into my mouth, and I literally froze, staring at him for about a minute--fork suspended in midair halfway into my open mouth.  I'm sure I was quite the vision.

So anyway, there ya go.  Maybe a rehire at our local University, but no offers yet.  Certain collapse of the department, probable collapse of the major program.  We shall see what we shall see.

This is one of the most amazing things I've ever seen.  I'm truly annoyed that they've disabled embeded video for it, so you'll hafta follow the link to see the YouTube video of Susan Boyle.

To quote Greenpa:  "I'll just say- the audience reaction is why- humanity is NOT headed for the ash heap."

ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG.  It's just incredible--indefinable.  Wow.

A whole lot happened today, most of it (1) f*cked up in 80 different ways, though not necessarily bad, and (2) probably not the sort of thing I can blog about yet.  Suffice it to say I'm still trying to fit my mind around a fair bit of it, and maybe good things will even come of it.  We'll find out soon--probably at about the same time I will be fully allowed to blog it.

For now, though, here's my current bitch.  Today I accidentally dumped an entire tray of Tigerella tomato sprouts all over the (carpeted) dining room floor.  And all over a bag of my children's new clothes.  The Tigerellas weren't our main crop tomatoes, and I've got time to start new ones, etc., etc., but still.  Damnit.

This is, by a fair margin, one of the best pieces of serious writing I have ever read:

http://sharonastyk.com/2009/04/12/not-a-bug-an-undocumented-feature-the-case-for-anti-modernism-part-i/

Please, seriously, take the time to read it.  It is comparatively short, but stunningly brilliant.  I reel at the fact that this is apparently "part one" of a longer piece.  I cannot wait to see what she follows this with.  But here is a quick excerpt of the current essay:

In the end, there is a common ground, however, and it is simply this - most of my readers come to this blog with a pervasive sense that what industrial society seems to promise them either has not arrived, or is not coming.  They see no future for themselves in the path we’ve been on.

And they are not wrong.  The whole premise of modernity as we practice it now is that future generations won’t mind the fact that we are using resources they will require, polluting and destroying the future capacity of the earth.  The whole and most fundamental premise of modernity is this - that because progress always goes forward, there is no need to consider the future.  And thus we create a culture that reverses the ordinary human desire to pass down to one’s posterity more than one already had - now we arrange life so that the future serves the present - children as yet unconceived will pay our debts and clean our messes.  The future is always and inevitably enslaved to the present, and since we do not wish to acknowledge this, we do not enjoy looking at the moral consequences of this, there is no reason to think much about the future at all.  Thus, modernity at one blow disposes of any future that doesn’t look like a science fiction movie.

I mean, for real... damn.